So I may be opening up the floodgates here, but I need some advice.
Kelton is 3.
Kelton wears a diaper.
I think he is now the oldest child at church who is not potty trained, or potty training.
I do not want to potty train him. I am actually quite happy to just change diapers. I am lazy and only change him in the morning when he wakes up and again if he is messy and then before bed. It's easy. Potty training is a mess. It's not easy. I don't like it. I don't want to do it.
I have potty trained one child, so I should know what I am doing, right? Well... I'd rather not go into that whole story right now. It's depressing. And I think it's the real reason why I never want to potty train another child. How am I supposed to potty train another child when the first one used up my ENTIRE (plus some) potty training patience reserve? And Kelton is headstrong, stubborn, always right, etc..., etc..., etc... I'm afraid one of us might not survive.
So. Help me out here. I need advice, strategies, methods, books, whatever you've got. I want to hear about it. For the sake of a very stubborn 3 year old (who really is a sweet boy) and his already-frusterated-just-thinking-about-it mother, please tell me you've found something that works. Please!
Wednesday, January 26, 2011
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7 comments:
I think this is my least favorite part of motherhood. Trevor was extremely stubborn. I couldn't even bribe him with a zebra--nothing worked for that kid and it was a long, not-fun-at-all process. So I have this fear of potty training now. I don't like the stress and frustration of it all. With Callie, I waited and put it off as long as I could. She was almost 3 and I figured I couldn't wait forever, so reluctantly we started and it only took a week. She still wore pullups through the night for a while, but it was really a fairly painless process. Being older may have helped or maybe it was being a girl (plus it helped that she had older siblings and wanted to be big). I'm not much help, but I feel for you. :) If I had the boys to do over, I'd probably teach them to sit every time at first. They liked standing (and sometimes its hard for them to aim sitting), but they both had issues with not wanting to sit when they needed to, so I'd probably wait to teach them to stand until they were trained.
Bryce was super stubborn too. He was 3 before he was potty trained. He just didn't care if he was in a wet diaper. Maybe it's in the bloodline since I see that Erica had a stubborn child too? :)
I used a reward/"bribe" system. I had "Bryce's Potty Candy". I put Hershey's Kisses in a bag and gave him 1 for #1 and 2 for #2. After a while, I only gave him candy if he asked and then I just tapered the candy off. The hardest part wasn't long over a week and then he was good during the day. He still wore pullups at night for a while but at least he was good during the day. :)
Pretty much I have no clue about potty training. Gracie happened to be willing and ready one day so I'm not sure what I will do if my kids resist. Maybe just take away diapers and that is that? Bribes? I am actually introducing the idea to Kemp very slowly by letting him wear underwear for only short periods and small treats for just sitting on the potty. But he is much younger. I did this with Graice though and the no pressure/casual approach of just letting her wear diapers but also praising/rewarding when I had her wear underwear (sometimes for only 15 minutes at a time) somehow worked. Hopefully it will work again for Kemp. Good luck and when you find a method that works, please share.
I despise potty training! With Kate I did the 3 day method. It worked really good. You throw the diapers away and go straight to underwear. No pull ups, no nothing. It is painful. But only for a few days and then they get it. Kate is also very stubborn and it got to the point where I had to take away her clothes, favorite blankets, and toys before she would go. That sounds so horrible, but she is STUBBORN! After that, she was fine and has done great ever since. I have the e-version I can e-mail you with. I think it's the best one.
I completely inteded to put it off as long as possible. I wanted until Jake was very unhappy whenever he had a wet diaper. Every time he wet it, he cried for a new diaper. I started putting him on the potty. I'd ask him probably every 30 minutes or so if he needs to go. If he tells me yes, we run to the potty. If he tells me no, I said, 'okay, tell me when you're ready.' I heard it's good to teach them to recognize the urge instead of setting a timer to go every time it goes off. I bought a bag of bite size licorish, and he gets 1 for pee, and 5 for poop. He was really scared to poop the first three times. once he pooped his pants, once he pooped on the bathroom floor, and I think the third time he waited until I put a pullup on him for bed and he pooped then. That was it. He gets a pullup at night time. I let him wear underwear at naptime and if he wakes up dry I give him a licorish. I take him on errands in underwear and give him a licorish when we get home if he's dry. I had to hide the diapers and tell him they were all gone, because he'd ask for them when he needed to poop at first. Let him pick out some fun underwear. That's all I know. The best of luck!!!
Oh, some might dis-agree with me, but I think if you try it out for a few days, or a week and it's not working, then stop and try again a few weeks later. just my opinion.
My most stubborn child to potty train was Emily. I waited like Erica till she was closer to 3 and I think that seemed to help. I did stickers though instead od candy like most people. She seemed to be o.k. with that and was eager to try to use the potty for a sticker. Don't let peer pressure or the fact he is the only one not potty trained force you and him into doing it before he is ready though. I think he might do better than you think he will though.
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